Chapter 7. Just Lick Your Fingers.

We’ve decided to cast off on a sailboat long before the kids were born. But they were part of the plan, so we’ve waited for them. Since they’re born, we take all precautions possible to make sure they know what a sailboat is. We buy books, have paintings, games…Subliminal or pretty in your face : we want them to get exposed as much as possible since their young age.

-Let’s change Matey so he wears his sailboat pajama!, Captain Sam says.

-He just got out of my womb… at least give the time to the doctor to cut the cord.

 

We never miss an occasion to mention the fact that we will someday be living at sea:

 

-Hey Salty, here’s some mangos for your snack.

-YES!!! I LOVE SNACKS!, and she adds. “I love mangos mommy.”

-I am happy you like it, because when we’ll be living on a boat, we’ll eat a lot of them.

 

She eats happily. Until she gets in distress:

 

-MOMMY!!!!! My hands are all sticky!

-Well, when we’ll be living on a boat, you’ll be able to clean your hands in the sea if we have the snack on the beach! That would be fun right?

-But MOMMY!!!!! MY HANDS ARE ALLLLLLLL STICKY – RIGHT NOW!

-… (sigh!)… just lick your fingers for now.

 

More than the blibber-blabber, we really try to expose the kids to marine life and boats rather than anything else. We choose toys that somehow relates to the sea life. The Christmas gift for Matey was a boat for the tub. Unfortunately for him (or us, hard to tell), it sinks! Speaking of which: who’s the stupid toy designer that managed to create a boat that skinks and takes water! Come on: you had one job. One job. Boat. Anyway.

 

We choose to watch Finding Dory rather than Frozen. I personally have nothing against Frozen. Except when this happens in 12 seconds. The movie the parents are leaving in a boat. Bye bye kids. We see the waves getting bigger, enormous, the sky gets darker and the ship gets far in the sea. The music gets dramatic…VERY dramatic… I realize at that moment what is about to happen: “HOLLY MOLLY: A SHIPWRECK!! LET’S DISTRACT SALTY! NO TIME TO WASTE!”

 

I literally put my face in front of her nose, trying to conceal the TV as much as I can and hoping we were not owning a 46 inches one.

 

“HEYYYY Salty!!!! Do you want some grapes? Strawberries?” No interest. I propose again: “Snack?!!”, she usually is really into food and snacks.

 

She frowns and tries to see the movie behind my face. NO SHE MUST NOT! My daughter won’t get scared of the sea because Walt Disney’s bad habit to make movies with orphins! I MUST find something and QUICK…

 

-Mangos? Popcorn!!? CHOCOLATE!!??

 

I got her attention:

-YES, OUI! Du chocolat! A HOT CHOCOLATE!!!

 

That was close. Too close. But it did work, as she never asked to watch the end of the movie. Bravo Cass, you smart girl! You saved the day. Happy me. Unfortunately, I did not save the evening. And Sam didn’t find me that smart when it was 1 hour past her bedtime and she was still jumping on our bed like there’s no tomorrow.

 

-I don’t know how you guys arranged to drink that hot chocolate, but she had 1 inch of chocolate all over the face, says Sam. Wiping her while she was jumping everywhere hasn’t been easy : I have more chocolate on my fingers than on the wipe!

 

-I know, and you her hands are still covered with chocolate. Look! She’s trying to run ON her desk now! Give me a hand we have to put her in the shower before we need to repaint to whole house.

-My fingers are super sticky Cass.

-She’s running for the stairs!! Catch her! She’s trying to make pirouettes in the stairs Sam! I need you over here NOW!

-Let me wash my hands first and I…

– JUST LICK YOUR FINGERS AND COME TO HELP ME!!!