Chapter 3. Stair Wars

The bottom of my basement staircase feels like the war room in the Star Wars rebel base.

To give you a bit of context, we’ve been rebuilding our current sailboat engine completely this winter…in the basement. It had major problem (namely water in the cylinder, thus not starting) and thought that doing the repairs ourselves would be much better than paying for both a diesel engine expert at high price and a diesel engine class. Sounds like a pretty good idea to understand very well how this work and how to fix it. Thing is, it weight a TON.

-We need to carry that engine through that very narrow staircase to end up getting it out through that small door, Sam says.

-Good luck. You’re gonna need it, I say like Ian Solo.

Sam makes a Yoda of himself and share some wisdom to this father, main helper of this epic task:

-We do. Or we do not. There is no try. (Yes, it is so heavy that going back the staircase is almost impossible).

They start pushing the engine up in the stairs using moving straps. The engine is unbalanced, most weight being handle on Sam, who’s face has dramatically more popping veins than Luke when he tries to lift the X-Wing out of the swamp.

After half an hour of struggles, sweat and back pain, Sam thinks “I’m starting to feel weak”. But, being as proud as a rooster (you should see his toupet at that time), he says:

-I should have had a breakfast this morning…

That’s the moment in the movie where Luke was about to being shot in the back while flying in the trench toward the dead star. Ian Solo arrive in saviour (in fact, it’s Sam’s Mom). She pops in the staircase:

-PEW! PEW! PEW!!!! Here’s some peanuts! Have some peanuts!

To my surprise, they manage to stabilize the engine and have a brief snack break. She leaves as swiftly as she arrived with Solo’s smile: “You’re all clear kid! Now let’s blow this thing and go home!”

I manage to join the troop and help in the saga. We move the engine 3 steps in 2 minutes with my help. Sam stares at me with Carrie Fisher’s look and says:

-I love you.

I nod.
-I know.

One last step to go. Sam’s Dad feels the strength of the peanuts and morphs into Luke Skywalker for good:

“Luke… Use the force…!”, he seems to hear.

And just them,  he decided that all Sam’s plan and techniques to progress inches by inches were just bullshit. Like Luke removing his aiming device before shooting the dead star, his Dad confidently grips the engine and bends:

-We’ll just force it out for the last step. OK!!! 1! 2!! …
-What do you mean 1, 2?!!!! Don’t lift that without tellin…
-3!!!!!!!

They growl  AARAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH like a mad Chewbacca.
And VICTORY!!! the engine is finally out of the house.

That afternoon, we made the ultimate test of our winter work on the engine. YES it DID start! We successfully passed the Diesel Engine class 101 and tamed the beast. A huge win for both Sam and I.

Side note, I must admit that there will be a bit of plaster to do in the staircase before selling the house. There is no war without losses. But for now, let’s celebrate with our little ewoks kids. They are already dancing around to the sound of tam tam.

*END OF EPISODE 1. Coming soon : The return of the Engine in the boat.